Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Mothering

This morning I babysat the children of a good friend of mine. She has a 4 year old boy and a little girl only 10 days younger than Ella. I don't often babysit...I'm not sure why. I guess it used to overwhelm me a lot with Ella's fussiness as a baby and having such small children. I don't know, but it was so enjoyable this time! Elijah loved having someone to play with and so did Ella. Despite having to keep them upstairs because of the renovations, it was really fun for my kids. It's so good for them to learn to share with kids other than their brother or sister. At one point I looked at all of them around me and realized that I could have children these ages. Haha, if Ella and their youngest were twins. Crazy! It made me dream of the day that we have a larger family. I feel like for so long I had just been in survival mode with my kiddos, that I sort of questioned ever having more. I have truly been enjoying being a mom for quite some time! I look back at some crazy, exhausting months in the beginning of 2010, and I am really looking forward to this new year.

I pray that I continue to seek the Lord's guidance, strength, grace and peace as I have my good and bad days with my children. It can be so utterly exhausting at times, but I can't imagine doing anything else in the whole world. Joel and I both have questioned whether or not we even wanted to have more children, because these young years are so draining. It's exciting to now see what life looks like even just in year two of Ella's life. We can do so much more together as a family and really enjoy being with each other. It's reassuring to know that no matter how big we grow our family, these years with our kids at home, no matter how stressful, are short! And we want to enjoy them and soak them up. I have seen a huge difference in my own attitude and my patience since I have continually been praying for the Lord to show me how to be a better mom and to be my strength. I really don't want to just "survive" these years that I do have little children, but I want to enjoy it fully.

2 comments:

Mark Buckwalter said...

hey kelly, i can identify with your thoughts and feelings on mothering. it is hard but oh so worth it right!?
it really does go by fast. older moms kept telling me that but until i sent my first to school i realized how fast it flew by where i had all of them at home all day. now some of my struggles are different... more dealing with attitudes and my own responses to them!!
anyways..be blessed on the journey.
heather

Kelly said...

oh heather, I cannot even begin to imagine what life will look like when they are older and have attitudes! I'm sure it will be a whole new struggle :) Blessings to you on this journey as well! I very much enjoy your blog and your openness :)